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Home»Business & Economy»My boss bullied me, but HR sided with them. What can I do?
Business & Economy

My boss bullied me, but HR sided with them. What can I do?

info@thewitness.com.auBy info@thewitness.com.auOctober 16, 2025No Comments3 Mins Read
My boss bullied me, but HR sided with them. What can I do?
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I recently made a complaint to HR about being bullied by my manager in the form of being set up to fail. I am in a same-sex relationship, and they also made insulting remarks about this. After I asked them to stop, they gave me a poor performance review.

When I approached HR, they were initially praising me for having the courage to speak up and for providing them with so much written evidence. They also said that they would investigate the matter. At the end of the investigation, I was called into a meeting. The HR person said the homophobic comments could not be substantiated as they were made in private, before commenting to the effect that the idea of me being set up to fail was all in my head and that the performance review was valid. Another manager in the meeting blamed me for having the audacity to put my manager’s job on the line.

Why is it with all the whistleblower protection and anti-victimisation laws in place that HR continues to protect the employer at the victim’s expense, even when being presented with written evidence?

If the organisation has good processes, their managers should be educated about appropriate workplace behaviours.

If the organisation has good processes, their managers should be educated about appropriate workplace behaviours.Credit: John Shakespeare

The term your manager used to refer to your relationship is disgraceful and would lead to severe disciplinary action in any organisation remotely serious about discrimination, bullying and basic decency. I was shocked when I read it, so I can only imagine how distressing it would have been for you.

I asked Dr John Molineux, a senior lecturer in human resource management at Deakin Business School, about your question. He said he thought the complaint you made should have been resolved without the HR team conflating it with performance.

“If a person feels bullied or [that] unwanted comments have been made relating to their sexual preference, it is important to treat the matter seriously and try and resolve it,” he says.

‘I believe the issue could have been resolved by the organisation through some form of mediation.’

Dr John Molineux, a Senior Lecturer in Human Resource Management at Deakin Business School

“First, it is important to hear the complainant’s story and see any evidence. Second, it is important to know what the complainant wants as an outcome – for example, could it be as simple as an apology and a commitment for it not to happen again?

“Third, the manager who made the comments may not be aware that the comments were potentially offensive or may have caused offence, even though the individual asked for the comments to stop.”

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