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Home»Latest»Moor drama, please
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Moor drama, please

info@thewitness.com.auBy info@thewitness.com.auFebruary 17, 2026No Comments3 Mins Read
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February 17, 2026 — 9:00pm

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John Brooks of Pyrmont is “unable to escape constant media commentary on the latest mutation of the gothic chick-lit Wuthering Heights (C8). It drove me into the murky land of anagrams where Jacob Elordi emerges as ‘Loco Bride, Ja?’. Which sort of sums it up.”

“A couple of contributors have reminded us of the dire financial situation in referring to Costa Living (C8),” writes Paul Hunt of Engadine. “I stayed at a hotel in Spain which had seen better days but still charged like a wounded bull. I can’t remember the name, but I called it Costa de Earth.”

On the back of Costa, Jobson Grothe, and current favourite Sarah Moaney, legions of readers have mentioned Emma Chissit (too many to mention, you know who you are). In checking if we’d given Emma a guernsey in the past, Granny discovered that in 1964, English author Monica Dickens was autographing her latest book at a Sydney bookshop. A woman handed her a copy and said, ‘Emma Chissit’. Miss Dickens duly wrote it in the dedication.”

“Not sure about footballers and poetry in motion (C8),” says Ian Morris of Strathfield. “But I was surprised to hear a bit of Shakespeare uttered by a burly front-row forward on the weekend. He dropped a simple pass, and I’m sure he referenced A Midsummer Night’s Dream when he shouted out ‘Puck!’”

Despite the grievance from Margaret Grove of Concord that “all this talk of jingles (C8) is giving me serious earworms,” we’re fielding more jingle submissions than we are Emma Chissits, and, therefore, here’s Tony DeGiovanni of Bawley Point: “I am 70-years-old and for some reason, can still remember the jingle ‘False teeth need three-way care, soak your dentures in Kendex’ jingle. Fortunately, I still have my own teeth.” Meri Will of Baulkham Hills says that “my enjoyment of the Toreador Song was not spoilt by the roller door advert, but by my brother singing: ‘Toreador, don’t spit on the floor. Spit out the window, that’s what it’s for’.”

“It hasn’t gone unnoticed that readers from Lancaster, Pennsylvania, USA; Scottsdale, Arizona, USA and New Ulm, Minnesota, USA received publishing glory in C8 on the one day,” denotes Lionel Latoszek. “How is a bloke from Long Jetty, Central Coast, NSW, Australia, Southern Hemisphere expected to get a look-in? Perhaps I will just hum I Still Call Australia Home.” We thank Lionel, for his 32nd look-in.

Column8@smh.com.au

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