Mackenzie Anderson’s son was just 23 months old when he witnessed his mother’s murder. Anderson was stabbed 78 times by her ex-partner, Tyler Thompson, in a frenzied attack in the Newcastle suburb of Mayfield in 2022.
The toddler had to be bathed of his mother’s blood before he was handed over to his grandmother, Tabitha Acret. Acret said her grandson arrived at her home in “extreme distress”, bashing his head against the wall, screaming and crying from the brutalities he had been witness to.
But while dealing with the traumatic loss of her daughter, Acret also had to fight an uphill battle to get her grandson mental health support.
She called over 20 psychology practises, including the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services, but none were willing to take the family on as clients.
“For six months, I was running around trying to find a psychologist, and I was just told no, your case is too complex.”
Eventually, she called an occupational therapist “desperate and in tears” who agreed to take the child on, and his behaviour has started to improve.
“Children don’t witness violence, they experience it, and they’re also primary victims,” Acret said.
“They need to be recognised as victims by the law, and the emotional damage needs to be recognised.”
Acret, who has been paying $300 out of pocket for years for the sessions, also struggled to find help for herself in the aftermath of the tragedy.
She’s also calling for a family or victim navigator to be assigned to the family to help them navigate the complexities of the health, social and court systems, and assist with the bureaucracy involved following a crime.
“It would have been nice if somebody could have come to my house and explained what the steps are, and then helped me get a counsellor, instead of me having to do it,” she said.
Act for Kids executive director Tom McIntyre said children who experienced domestic and family violence were more likely to have emotional and behavioural problems in childhood, adolescence and adulthood than children who had not experienced it.
“[It] can lead to long-term trauma in children, which can show up in schools, the healthcare system and in the relationships young people make in the community,” McIntyre said.
“We need to ensure the voices of young people are heard and recognised, and to bring about healing, we need to address the effects on children and young people who experience domestic and family violence.”
The 2022 Australian Personal Safety Survey found one in eight adults had witnessed violence between their parents or caregivers before the age of 15. Young people who witness parental domestic violence are more likely to become victims of domestic violence as adults.
The University of Melbourne Associate Professor of Social Work Kristin Diemer said supports have traditionally focused on a mother experiencing family and domestic violence.
“We feel that if we protect the mother, she will protect the child, which is asking an awful lot of a mother going through trauma to also support children going through trauma,” she said.
“We have a history of not creating appropriate services for children themselves, and we don’t have the service support easily accessible for young people and children.”
Diemer said being able to talk to people who are independent of their family helps children process and recover.
“Children and young people will understand stress and strain in a relationship regardless of whether they actively view it. It penetrates into how they live their lives,” she said.
Support is available from the National Sexual Assault, Domestic Family Violence Counselling Service at 1800RESPECT (1800 737 732) or the Men’s Referral Service on 1300 766 491.
